wedding rehearsal

Rehearsals Reduce Stress

 in Ceremony / Wedding Party / Wedding processional / Wedding Rehearsal / Weddings  tagged stess reduction / wedding / wedding ceremony / wedding party / wedding rehearsal by

Rehearsals reduce stress for the couple being married, their attendants and parents, and anyone else who has a role in the wedding ceremony. While I often tell people that wedding ceremonies are not rocket science, a rehearsal will help ensure that everyone looks their best and is comfortable with the experience.

I include a rehearsal in the pricing for my celebrant services for weddings because I think they are an important part of ceremony preparation. At rehearsal I meet with the couple, their attendants (bridesmaids and groomsmen), parents, and any other people who have a role in the ceremony. This includes flower girls, ring bearers, readers, and friends or family who will be running the music for the ceremony.

Rehearsals reduce stress by allowing people in the processional to practice where they are going to walk and stand. They allow readers or musicians to practice in the ceremony space. The wedding party sees who they are following up the aisle, and we discuss what cues will tell them when to walk. Once in front, everyone can find their place and know where to stand for the ceremony.

Beyond basic movement, we chat about how the men are to offer their arm to the women, and where the women are to place their hand on the offered arm. Our world is so casual these days, that this small bit of etiquette is often totally unknown to the wedding participants. We also discuss how the women should hold their flowers and remind the men to keep their hands out of their pockets. These small things can result in a more elegant appearance and much better pictures, too.

Rehearsals are often followed with a dinner or social gathering. This also reduces stress as members of the wedding party who haven’t met before can get to know each other and be more comfortable with each other at the ceremony. The wedding day is full of hustle and bustle and many guests, so a rehearsal dinner is a great opportunity to celebrate privately with those special people who are part of your wedding party, too.

Three Follow-up Stories

 in Ceremony / Weddings  tagged children in weddings / outdoor weddings / wedding ceremonies / wedding rehearsal by

Three follow-up stories are needed to provide updates to previous blog posts based on recent experiences. Experience always speaks louder than words, so allow me to share a few recent experiences that re-enforce my thoughts on some wedding related topics.

First, on the topic of early and late season outdoor weddings. Fall came quickly to Minnesota this year. Within a two week period I presided at a 90 degree, humid mid-September ceremony and two very chilly, blustery even, late September weddings. If you are planning a “shoulder season” wedding, I encourage you to let your guests know that an outdoor ceremony is planned so they can dress appropriately. You might also consider providing blankets for your guests, if possible. There were quite a few lightly dressed, shivering guests at the late September weddings.

Next, on the topic of rehearsals – I’m a fan of them, but realize that ceremonies are not rocket science. I’ve had a few recent ceremonies where the couple opted to go without a rehearsal that I ran. These experiences reminded me of all the little things that are covered at rehearsals – what time to gather to prep for the processional, how the men should offer their arm to the women in the wedding party, a reminder to keep hands out of pockets when walking into the ceremony space, and the fine details of where people will stand and how we will move during the ceremony. Both ceremonies were lovely, but could have been a bit more polished with a rehearsal.

The last of the three follow-up stories is about children in the wedding party. Recent ceremonies planned to include children; a four year old flower girl in one, and two sign bearers, approximately age three, in the second. The flower girl had practiced walking up the aisle, was going to be following one of her uncles, and had even read a story about a flower girl with her parents before the big day. Everything seemed set for success until the moment when she was to walk up the aisle with many strangers sitting in the chairs. She balked, and her mother whisked her away. As the ceremony began they quietly took chairs and enjoyed the ceremony. In the second ceremony one of the sign bearers broke down, too, and entered the ceremony in his mother’s arms (she was a bridesmaid, so that was fine). At the front, however, he couldn’t deal with letting her join the rest of the wedding party, and a family member quickly removed him from the space altogether. These experiences remind us that the little people really do get to do as they wish, and we need to be ready to react. With plans made ahead of time, both the ceremonies continued without a problem, and the children’s needs were met, too.

As these three follow-up stories demonstrate, planning all aspects of your wedding day really pays off. Your guests are more comfortable, your wedding party is confident, and the children in your wedding party are cared for. Wedding planning is a big, complex job, but pays off when your day arrives and flows smoothly.