wedding ceremony

Wedding Rings – An Integral Part of Wedding Ceremonies

 in Ceremony / Weddings  tagged exchange of rings / wedding ceremony / wedding rings / weddings by

Wedding rings are one of the oldest physical representations of marriage, and the exchange of rings is still an integral part of most wedding ceremonies today. The historical significance of wedding rings is rich and interesting.

In Ancient Rome, the groom would present his bride with an iron ring, which is the origin of today’s metal wedding bands. The durable material symbolized strength and permanence. The Romans, as well as the Greeks, placed the ring on the fourth finger of the left hand because they believed that the finger contained the vena amoris, or the vein of love.

Rings still symbolize the union of two people and identify them as a couple. Although couples in many European countries wear their rings on the right hand, there is a theory that the left ring finger was selected as the preferred choice because the ring would receive less damage since most people are right handed.

In many cultures, it was traditional for only the woman to wear a wedding ring. This was also true in the United States prior to World War II. During the war, many servicemen wore their wedding rings as a sign of commitment and as a way to remember their wives while stationed overseas. The tradition continued during the Korean War. After this, wedding ring sets became more popular among civilians as well. The popularity of wedding rings has brought about many diverse styles. In addition to gold, silver and platinum, you can now get durable silicone rings, which are ideal for active couples.

While most couples choose to both give and receive rings in modern wedding ceremonies, sometimes ring wearing is precluded by profession (machinists and some medical professionals are examples here) or by personal preference. In these cases a single ring ritual can still be included in the wedding ceremony with both the giver and wearer acknowledging the significance of the ring as a sign of lasting love and commitment.

Many couples choose to include an additional “unity ritual” in their ceremonies, but the exchange of wedding rings remains the original and lasting sign of the promises of love and commitment voiced in the wedding vows. As I say in many of the ceremonies I write, the rings announce to the world, “I love… and I am loved.” When you glance at your wedding rings may you remember the promises made to and by you, and may you remember the special day you shared those promises with the world.

Amplifying Voices for Your Ceremony

 in Ceremony / Weddings  tagged amplification / wedding / wedding ceremony by

Amplifying voices for your ceremony can be an overlooked item when planning for your wedding day. But with your guests gathering from near and far you want to make sure they can hear the ceremony and those special vows that take you across the threshold into marriage.

Even if you’re having an intimate ceremony with immediate family and friends you’ll want to consider amplifying voices for your ceremony. Outdoor ceremonies are especially prone to audio issues as the wind can take voices away from your guests, street noise and even the noises of nature can be louder than you expect. You definitely want to visit your venue on the day of week and as close to your ceremony time as possible to evaluate the area for ambient noises. The rumbling of a refrigerator truck at the loading dock of a golf club during a Friday afternoon ceremony a few years ago would have been disastrous if microphones had not been in place.

Wedding venues sometimes have audio equipment that can be used or rented for your ceremony. If you have a DJ providing music for the ceremony they may be able to provide microphones for the celebrant and readers, too. Because amplifying voices is so important, I’ve invested in a few different portable systems so I can provide what is needed for ceremonies, and some other celebrants do as well. Make sure that you discuss the audio needs with your celebrant and any soloists and make arrangements to have the right audio equipment in place for your ceremony.

Special audio considerations will be needed if your venue does not have electricity (there are battery powered audio systems available, too). You’ll need to figure out what kinds of microphones are needed – hand held, wearable (lavalier or headset), wired or wireless, and if stands are needed. Different audio systems provide for different numbers and kinds of audio inputs, too, so make sure that any system you plan to use can accommodate the number and kind of devices you need.

Using microphones for your personal vows allows your guests to share this important moment in your ceremony.

On a final note, make sure that a sound check is done before the ceremony begins and that a knowledgeable person is available to manage the audio equipment so amplifying voices for your ceremony is seamless and inconspicuous. Your guests can then focus on what they are hearing and experiencing with you as you make your promises and begin your marriage.

Unplugged Ceremonies: A Growing Trend

 in Ceremony / Guests / Weddings  tagged unplugged ceremony / wedding ceremonies / wedding ceremony / wedding guests by

Unplugged ceremonies are a growing trend for weddings. Simply put, an unplugged ceremony means your guests leave their phones and other devices in their pockets or purses during the ceremony. There are a few reasons to consider having an unplugged ceremony:

  1. Your photographer can do a better job. I’ve seen people step into the aisle to get a picture of the bride as she enters, totally cutting off the photographer who you’ve paid to capture the important moments of your wedding day.
  2. All your guests can see better. No one is standing or holding a device up in front of other guests trying to capture your entire ceremony on video, or taking lots of pictures.
  3. Your guests are able to be fully present with you during the ceremony. Guests will stay in their seats and pay attention to the celebrant, readers, musicians and most importantly to you as you share your promises to each other. No one will step in front of your parents to get a picture or video of the ring exchange as happened at one wedding I officiated.

You can achieve an unplugged ceremony with a tasteful sign at the back of the chairs, inviting guests to put their devices away so they can fully share in your ceremony. An even more effective way to communicate your wishes is to have your celebrant make a simple announcement before the processional begins. People sometimes don’t read signs, or feel comfortable ignoring them, but rarely do they hold their devices up after being specifically requested not to.

When I glance out at your gathered guests at an unplugged wedding I see smiles, perhaps a happy tear, and many sets of eyes focused on you and engaged in the moment. Otherwise it can be like looking at a sea of screens as nearly everyone tries to snap a picture or frame a video shot. While unplugged ceremonies are gaining in popularity, I’ve also encountered couples who have no concern with their guests snapping away during the ceremony, so as with all aspects of your wedding day, you can choose what best fits you.

What Happens at a Secular Wedding?

 in Celebration / Ceremony / Personalization / Secular wedding / Weddings  tagged secular ceremonies / secular ceremony / secular wedding / wedding / wedding ceremony / weddings by

“What happens at a secular wedding?” is a common question for couples who have been raised in a religious tradition. The answer is simple. Pretty much whatever you want. In Minnesota, the only requirements to make a marriage legal are to have the proper paperwork, two witnesses, and say you want to be married to each other. It can be as simple as that, but most couples want to mark this important moment in their lives with something more significant.

Traditional weddings often have religious prayers, rituals and readings, so it is very reasonable to ask what happens at a secular wedding when you remove all of that. Does it still look like a wedding as you know it? Will you feel married after a secular wedding? What will your guests think of your secular wedding?

Rest assured that your secular wedding can still have much of the look and feel of a traditional wedding, if that is your wish. You can have a meaningful, possibly even a more meaningful exchange of vows, and secular weddings can be significant, memorable experiences for you as a couple and for your guests.

The general approach is to use secular wording, readings and rituals in place of religious language and actions. In your secular wedding you have a virtually unlimited choice of music. Any genre, live or recorded, can be used. You can select from contemporary poetry or literature for a reading, or use passages from ancient writers and poets if you prefer. There are a variety of secular, meaningful unity rituals to choose from, too. From tree plantings to love letters to handfastings and beer sharings, there is something for everyone who wants a unity ritual in their wedding. And that’s the beauty of secular weddings.

So now you know why the answer to the question, “What happens at a secular wedding?” is, “Pretty much whatever you want.” Your ceremony can be written or modified for you since there are no rules imposed by religious authorities. It can be authentic because you select the what and how of all the elements of your ceremony. This is a great opportunity to put your personal stamp on this important part of your wedding day. Work with your celebrant to ensure all aspects of your ceremony reflect who you are and what you are promising to each other in marriage. Have fun collaborating to create your perfect ceremony for your special day.

Three Tips Can Make Your Ceremony Memorable

 in Celebration / Ceremony / Weddings  tagged ceremony tips / memorable wedding / wedding ceremony by

Three tips can make your ceremony memorable for the rest of your life. Without focus on your part the ceremony can become a blur instead of the most significant part of your wedding day. These three tips will help you get the most from your ceremony and help launch the rest of your wedding celebration.

Tip 1: Let the stress go. Don’t think about things that have or might go wrong with your celebration. Don’t worry about the dinner and dance yet to come, or wonder whether the reception space is ready to go. Before you walk down the aisle, take a few deep breaths to center yourself so you can be in the moment.

Tip 2: Savor the moment. Now that you’re experiencing your walk up the aisle and your ceremony, see your guests who have gathered. Hear your celebrant as she shares your story and celebrates all that marriage can be. Feel the love surrounding you from your partner, your wedding party, your family and friends. Touch your partner’s hands and know they are with you every step of the way.

Tip 3: Lead with your heart. As you say your vows, really focus on the love you feel for your partner and the promises you are making to them. And as you receive your partner’s vows listen closely and maintain eye contact with them. These moments are setting the stage for your future together and you want to remember them clearly.

Remembering these three tips can make your ceremony memorable by bringing it into focus. You’ll have mental snapshots of faces, words, promises, rituals, and of course, your first kiss as a married couple. These memories will carry you through the rest of your wedding day and for years to come as you reflect clearly on the moments that marked this happy, loving milestone moment in your life.