memorable wedding

Ceremonies to Remember: Involving Others

 in Blended family / Ceremony / Personalization / Rituals / Unity Rituals / Weddings  tagged blended family / memorable wedding / personalized wedding / wedding ceremonies / wedding ceremony / weddings by

Involving Others in novel ways in your ceremony shows your love and respect for them. This post is the third in the Ceremonies to Remember series where I reflect on some of the special moments I’ve experienced and some of the creative parts of the more than 400 ceremonies I’ve conducted over the last 10+ years. The previous posts focused on ceremonies I’ve done for family members and unique processionals.

Traditional ways of involving others in your ceremony include as bridesmaids and groomsmen, as ushers and flower girls. But some of the couples I married found unique ways to include those important to them. In one case the groom had a daughter who was about 10 years old. They wanted to include her in the ceremony to honor the new family they were becoming. A handfasting had been chosen as their unity ritual, and they chose to have his daughter actual wrap and tie the ribbon, signifying her support for their marriage. The cord was made extra long, so after the couple were connected, the daughter placed her hand on top of theirs. The cord was then wrapped and tied around the three hands, denoting the new family formed by the ceremony. It was a touching moment, and there wasn’t a dry eye in the crowd.

Family Handfasting

A second couple chose to honor their parents in a way that also honored their heritage. Early in the wedding ceremony the parents stepped forward to present gifts of bread, wine, salt and a coin to the couple. Each had significance from their European heritage which was shared with the guests. The ritual also made clear the love and support the bride and groom were receiving from their new in-laws as they were welcomed to the family.

Parents gifts

The final example of involving others in a ceremony in a special way honored the bride’s Indian heritage. After the exchange of vows and rings in the western tradition, her grandfather presided over the Seven Steps ritual. This ritual marks the commitment the couple makes to each other as they take their first steps as a married couple. To make this moment even more special, he had performed the same ritual with his daughter (the bride’s mother) when she married nearly 30 years ago.

These three examples show how some thought, creativity and sensitivity when involving others in your wedding ceremony ensure that it will be significant and memorable for everyone. When you choose to have a ceremony written just for you there are nearly endless ways of involving others who are important to you.

Three Tips Can Make Your Ceremony Memorable

 in Celebration / Ceremony / Weddings  tagged ceremony tips / memorable wedding / wedding ceremony by

Three tips can make your ceremony memorable for the rest of your life. Without focus on your part the ceremony can become a blur instead of the most significant part of your wedding day. These three tips will help you get the most from your ceremony and help launch the rest of your wedding celebration.

Tip 1: Let the stress go. Don’t think about things that have or might go wrong with your celebration. Don’t worry about the dinner and dance yet to come, or wonder whether the reception space is ready to go. Before you walk down the aisle, take a few deep breaths to center yourself so you can be in the moment.

Tip 2: Savor the moment. Now that you’re experiencing your walk up the aisle and your ceremony, see your guests who have gathered. Hear your celebrant as she shares your story and celebrates all that marriage can be. Feel the love surrounding you from your partner, your wedding party, your family and friends. Touch your partner’s hands and know they are with you every step of the way.

Tip 3: Lead with your heart. As you say your vows, really focus on the love you feel for your partner and the promises you are making to them. And as you receive your partner’s vows listen closely and maintain eye contact with them. These moments are setting the stage for your future together and you want to remember them clearly.

Remembering these three tips can make your ceremony memorable by bringing it into focus. You’ll have mental snapshots of faces, words, promises, rituals, and of course, your first kiss as a married couple. These memories will carry you through the rest of your wedding day and for years to come as you reflect clearly on the moments that marked this happy, loving milestone moment in your life.

Three Things Ensure a Memorable Wedding Day

 in Weddings  tagged memorable wedding by

Three things ensure a memorable wedding day that will be perfect for you. Every couple planning their wedding day right now knows how overwhelming it can be and how many tasks need to be attended to. But by focusing on three things you can be confident that your day will be what you want it to be.

Here are the three things to stay focused on:
1. Decide together on four or five things that are the most important to you. Invest your time and money on those things first. You can invest less in the many other tasks that will need to be handled, and may even choose to delegate some of those tasks to family members and friends who offer to help. A great example of this is the couple who identified a meaningful ceremony, good food, time together, and a fun reception as the most important things to them. They engaged a florist friend to handle decor and the mothers to provide welcome bags for out of town guests staying at hotels.

2. Keep traditions you like, and jettison the rest. If you find the garter and bouquet toss creepy, feel free to exclude them from your celebration. If you like the idea of having your dad escort you down the aisle, that is what you should do. Wedding traditions are great, but your preferences and what is authentic for you are always more important.

3. Make time for each other. The wedding day is all about you as a couple, but it takes some focus and effort to make time for you to savor the day together. Many activities will take you away from each other, or keep you surrounded by others, so make sure you plan for some snippets of time throughout the day for the two of you to share some personal, private moments. A first look, a few quiet minutes together after your ceremony, and a break in a quiet space during the reception give you time to treasure the experience… together.

Using these three things as a guide you’ll have a wedding day that puts your priorities first and keep the two of you at the center of the day. And that ensures a memorable day that will be perfect for you.