engagement length

The optimal engagement length will vary based on many factors. It’s a good idea to begin your wedding planning with an open mind and lots of flexibility. Your venue(s) are likely to be the thing that determines how long your engagement will be as many of them book far in advance. But there are ways to plan your wedding in only a few months if that’s what you want or need to do.

Highly favored wedding venues for both your ceremony and reception are likely to be booked far in advance if you are looking for a popular month in your area. Here in Minnesota we’re seeing a shift from May and June as the most popular wedding months to September and October. So if you want a fall Saturday at an in-demand venue like the Mayowood Stone Barn, you may be scheduling a year or even two years in advance. If you are willing to consider a wedding between November and April you’ll have more venues and dates to choose from.

Friday and Sunday dates, even during peak months, may also provide you with more options and shorter lead times. You may even benefit from reduced prices on these days, although that is by no means certain. When choosing the day for your wedding you’ll want to make sure that the most important people on your guest list are available to share in your special day.

Flexibility is key in the selection of your venue(s), too. Depending on the size and formality of your wedding, you might consider places like Plummer House, Studio 324, or even local restaurants or backyards. Thinking outside the box, especially if you have a smaller guest list, can open up some lovely and interesting options.

Other vendors that you will want to book early are your photographer, musicians and officiant. Especially if you want the people with the best reputations and experience you’ll find that calendars book early. Again, you’ll find more availability on non-Saturday dates in late fall and winter months. Finding a date that works for you, your key guests, and your key vendors will allow you to settle on your wedding date and move forward with your planning.

The optimal engagement length also provides time for you and your fiance(e) to continue to grow your relationship. This is a time to consider how well matched you are for the long term so you can walk down the aisle confident that you are marrying the right person. If I had to pick the optimal engagement length that allows you to do this important work, along with all the tasks associated with planning a significant wedding event, I would choose around a year.

If you don’t have that much time for whatever reason, remember that you can be married in a simple ceremony, surrounded by a few important family and friends, in a much shorter time. I’ve even performed the simplest of weddings on the same day I was contacted by a couple. So begin your wedding planning as soon as you’re engaged. Decide what is important to you in a wedding, and that will determine the optimal engagement for you.