Wedding planning

3 Tips to Smooth Your Ceremony Experience

 in Ceremony / Guests / Wedding planning / Weddings  tagged wedding ceremony / wedding guests / wedding planning / weddings by

Follow these 3 tips to smooth your ceremony experience. While not an integral part of your wedding ceremony, they help your guests feel welcome. These 3 tips will allow your guests to have a comfortable, memorable experience. Following the ceremony they’ll be ready to move on to the rest of your celebration.

  1. Help your guests find the ceremony space. This can begin with a map on your wedding website to assist guests from outside the area. But you can do more. Have signs on the roadside near the final turnoff to guide your guests to the ceremony site. Perhaps you need another sign pointing them to parking, and yet another one directing them to the actual ceremony space. If your ceremony space isn’t visible from the parking area, designate an usher to stand near the parking lot and direct people as needed.

2. Let your guests know where you want them to sit. Many couples are opting for more casual seating at their ceremony. The days of ushers escorting every guest to their seat are mostly gone. But your guests don’t know what your preferences are, so post an usher near the back of the chairs to greet guests and clue them in. A sign can be helpful here, too, letting people know to choose their seat without observing traditional “bride’s side” and “groom’s side” rules.

Don’t forget about reserved space in the front for immediate family members. Guests will tend to seat themselves close to the back to avoid rows meant for family. This can result in a gulf of empty chairs between family and friends when everyone could be closer to the action. Hanging a few “Reserved” signs as needed can keep the needed space open and let guests know where they are welcome to sit.

3. Tell your guests what comes next. A receiving line, where the couple and their parents greet all the guests is the most traditional activity immediately following the ceremony. But if you’re taking pictures right away, or want your guests to move directly to social hour make sure you tell them. Otherwise your guests will sit awkwardly in the ceremony space wondering if they should stay or go. A simple announcement near the end of your ceremony works well, or you can have ushers release guests from their rows and invite them to proceed as you wish.

There are literally hundreds of details that go into planning your wedding day, and each one needs to be considered if you want to have a smooth celebration. Ignoring details like these can result in delays and confusion. You have a vision for your day and with the help of these 3 tips to smooth your ceremony experience it can become a reality. Happy planning!

Finding Your Wedding Officiant

 in Celebrant / Officiant / Secular wedding / Wedding planning / Weddings  tagged legal wedding / selecting wedding celebrant / selecting wedding officiant / wedding / wedding ceremonies / wedding ceremony / wedding officiant / weddings by

Finding your wedding officiant is one of the most significant decisions you will make about your wedding. Your ceremony is the element of your wedding day that legally marries you – what the day is all about. It is also the first “public” event of day, where your guests gather with you and your wedding party. Your ceremony sets the tone for the rest of your day, so you want to select an officiant who can create that celebratory first impression to get things started on a high note.

A recent article in Brides magazine includes not only information about officiant costs, but has a great set of questions you can ask a potential officiant. The article closes with some considerations to help guide you in making the right final decision. It’s definitely worth a read before you embark on the task of finding your wedding officiant.

Clarification on some terms may help you in choosing your officiant, too. Most broadly, an officiant is the person who will legally marry you. They may be religious, secular or civil, but if they have the legal standing to marry you, they are an officiant. Religious officiants include priests, ministers, rabbis, etc. Civil officiants, depending on your state laws, may carry Judge, Notary, or similar titles. Secular officiants often, but not always, use the title Celebrant. But beware though, the celebrant title does not have a consistent definition, so anyone can call themselves a celebrant. You’ll want to ask a few questions about any officiant’s education, training and experience before choosing to work with them.

It’s also important to understand how each potential officiant works with clients. You may want to ask questions including:

  • Do we get to see the ceremony script ahead of time?
  • Can we make/request changes to the ceremony script?
  • How do you personalize the ceremony for us?
  • Can we write our own vows? Select our own music?
  • How do we best communicate with each other – email, phone, text?

There aren’t right or wrong questions to the questions above. It is important, however, that you have a good understanding of and are comfortable with the answers the officiant provides.

So go ahead and begin your search for your officiant as soon as you have your wedding date and venue identified. Finding your wedding officiant can feel like a daunting task. You’ll find, however, that most officiants are approachable, kind, and are willing to guide your initial discussion if you prefer. They are the professionals after all, and have more experience than you do.

Finding Opportunity in Crisis

 in Celebration / Ceremony / COVID-19 / Engagement / Wedding planning / Weddings  tagged COVID-19 / wedding / wedding celebration / wedding ceremony / wedding day / weddings by

Finding opportunity in crisis is a characteristic of resilient people. Our resilience is being tested daily as we continue to deal with the COVID-19 pandemic, especially in relation to the milestone moments in life. If you got engaged in 2019 or early 2020 you likely expected your wedding planning to follow a fairly predictable path. All of that got turned upside down when the pandemic reached our area in March of this year.

For engaged couples trying to plan a wedding in recent months the uncertainties have been overwhelming. How many people will be allowed to gather? Is my chosen venue even open? How can a wedding party practice social distancing? Will guests feel safe attending my wedding? Can family and friends travel for the festivities? When will this end?

All of these questions have caused stress for already engaged couples planning 2020 ceremonies. And then there are couples who feel ready to get engaged, but struggle to figure out how to even begin planning a wedding with all the uncertainties in front of them.

Finding opportunity in crisis is possible, however, so do not lose heart. Begin by prioritizing the elements of your wedding day. What is most important to you? The ceremony? The party? The dance? Having your grandparents witness your exchange of vows? Or simply being married and able to begin your marriage journey together? Depending on your answer, finding opportunity in crisis will be different for each of you.

If you want to be married most of all, you can consider a simple certificate signing in front of the legally required witnesses (and maybe a couple of other people). If you want a large gathering, including older friends and relatives, postponing your wedding day may be the right answer for you. Perhaps an intimate gathering with 20 or so people, including a sweet ceremony and significant vows followed by an informal meal where social distancing can be observed and face coverings can be worn may be perfect.

If you choose a certificate signing or intimate ceremony for now, remember that you can plan a larger celebration after the pandemic passes. That celebration can include a wonderful, personal ceremony, too. Wedding ceremonies usually serve the dual purpose of legally marrying you and voicing your commitment and promises in front of the people important to you. But those two purposes can be separated. You can legally marry now and share a wonderful wedding day including a ceremony honoring the commitment you made to each other earlier in private.

Finding opportunity in crisis means thinking outside the box, looking for different ways to accomplish your goals, and bringing creativity to your wedding planning. While there are benefits to being legally married, remember to honor your love and commitment with family and friends when circumstances allow you to do so. When this crisis passes, I believe that we’ll recognize and treasure the opportunities to celebrate life’s milestones with our communities of family and friends even more.

A Moment of Reflection

 in Wedding planning / Weddings  tagged wedding / wedding planning by

A moment of reflection can help reduce stress as we all deal with the changes that the COVID-19 pandemic has brought to our lives. Perhaps you are newly engaged and beginning to plan your wedding day. Or perhaps your wedding date is only months away and you’re trying to figure out if you should postpone or hold your date. No matter where you are in the planning process you are likely stressed with the unknowns of what the future will bring. I received the poem below from a colleague, and hope you will find it as helpful in finding perspective as I did.

IN THE TIME OF QUIET by Philippa Atkin

No one’s told the daffodils about the pause to Spring
And no one’s told the birds to roost and asked them not to sing
No one’s asked the lazy bee to cease his bumbling round
And no one’s stopped the bright green shoots emerging through the ground
No one’s told the sap to rest, deep within the wood
And stop the sleepy trees from waking, wreathed about in bud
No one’s told the sky to douse its brightest shades of blue
And stop the scudding clouds from puffing headlong into view
No one’s asked the lambs to still the springs beneath their feet,
To stop their rapid rush and quell each joyful bleat
No one’s told the stream to halt its gurgle or its flow
And warned the playful breezes, not to gust and blow
No one’s asked the raindrops not to fall upon the earth
And fail to quench the soil in the season of rebirth
No one’s locked the sun down, or dimmed the shimmer of the moon
And even in the darkest night, the stars are still immune
Remember what you value, remember who is dear
Close the doors to danger and keep your family near
In the quiet all around us take the time to sit and stare
And wonder at the glory unfurling everywhere
Look towards the future, after the ordeal
And keep faith in Mother Nature’s power and will to heal

Wishing everyone good health and encouraging you to breathe deeply, hug your loved one if you’re able, and remember that this, too, shall pass.