Ceremony

Advantages of Intimate Wedding Ceremonies

 in Ceremony / COVID-19 / Guests / Personalization / Weddings  tagged ceremony / COVID-19 / intimate ceremonies / wedding ceremony / wedding guests / weddings by

The advantages of intimate wedding ceremonies are significant. With a smaller guest list options exist for all aspects of the ceremony. You might be opting for a smaller number of ceremony guests due to safety and health restrictions, or just because the idea appeals to you.

Either way, consider some of these options and advantages of intimate wedding ceremonies:

  • Choose a circle or semi-circle ceremony space layout. These connect you to your guests in a visual and emotional way.
  • Opt to forego a wedding party, simplifying planning and expenses and keeping the focus on you as a couple during the ceremony.
  • Invite guests to participate: identify someone to hold your bouquet and someone else to hold the rings.
  • Leverage skills and interests of your guests as readers, musicians or DJ for the ceremony, and even as photographer if you’re lucky enough to have a talented family member or friend.
  • Include spontaneous moments. Perhaps you want to speak to your families and express appreciation for their assistance and support. Or near the end of the ceremony you can invite them to voice their wishes for you going forward.

It’s not uncommon for couples to express concern about being the center of attention with all eyes on them during the ceremony. But smaller guest lists offer less of a “show” feeling to the ceremony and offer you less stress and more connection with your guests. Your ceremony can also be more intimate, sharing inside stories that family and close friends will understand. You can be more open and vulnerable to each other in front of a small group of close family and friends.

While large ceremonies have their own beauty, the advantages of intimate wedding ceremonies make them a great option for many couples. Whether it is to keep you and your guests safe in the time of COVID-19, or to best fit your personal style, make sure you discuss an intimate ceremony option with your wedding celebrant when planning your wedding day.

Our Responsibilities Going Forward

 in Ceremony / COVID-19 / Guests / Memorial services / Weddings  tagged COVID-19 / funerals / Masks / memorial service / Social distancing / wedding ceremony / weddings by

Our responsibilities going forward continue as states begin to ease restrictions on gatherings including weddings and funerals/memorials. As our country and state continue to deal with COVID-19, many areas are beginning to lift or ease limitations on wedding ceremonies and memorial services. In almost all cases there are still restrictions in place, and we owe it to ourselves and our loved ones to honor them.

The number of people allowed to gather for ceremonies varies depending on whether it is taking place outdoors or indoors, and depending on the capacity of indoor spaces. But in all cases we are being asked to observe social distancing and to wear masks. Social distancing by household will require different seating plans (and in some places chairs are not being allowed at all). While masks hardly make a fashion statement as part of guests’ attire, the long incubation period of the virus makes them essential.

Masks are not worn to protect the wearer, but to help ensure that the wearer is not unknowingly transmitting the virus. Anywhere between two and 14 days can elapse between the time you are infected and the time you begin to show symptoms. If you attend a gathering during that time, feeling perfectly well and not knowing that you’ve been exposed, you can infect dozens of other people without knowing it.

A number of COVID-19 outbreaks have been traced back to funerals and other gatherings. That’s in part because it is so difficult to keep our distance when we want to show our support and to mourn together. We get too close without even thinking about it. And it doesn’t take long for the virus to spread.

Have you ever attended a wedding where you didn’t want to hug the happy couple, or the relatives you haven’t seen in awhile, or the school friends you’ve lost touch with through the years? We do it without thinking, and might well not know that we are giving or receiving the virus with those happy hugs. Our responsibilities going forward are to care for ourselves and others as COVID-19 continues to be an issue.

It may not be fun, but our responsibilities going forward include continuing to practice social distancing and to wear masks. It may be your own life you save, or the life of a relative or friend. None of us would knowingly put others at risk, and unfortunately, masks and social distancing are the best tools we have at this time to keep each other safe. So let’s be happy that restrictions are easing, but be cautious and diligent going forward, so we are part of the solution to this virus, and not part of the problem.

Creativity in the time of COVID-19

 in Ceremony / COVID-19 / Memorial services / Weddings  tagged baby welcoming / creative ceremonies / memorial service / weddings by

“Creativity in the time of COVID-19” is one of the ways 2020 will be remembered. Celebrating and honoring important moments in life is a universal need, and many traditions have grown up around that need. We honor the birth of a child, a couple joining in marriage, and the death of a loved one. All of the ceremonies, celebrations and memorials that help us recognize those important moments in life are being turned upside down due to the pandemic ravaging our country right now.

Even in the midst of the limitations on gatherings and stay at home orders we’re living under in Minnesota, people are exercising their creativity in the time of COVID-19. You may have heard of using technology like Zoom or Facetime to allow guests to participate in weddings and memorial services. With these tools your loved ones are able to view and hear the ceremonies of celebration and remembrance from the safety of their own homes.

Some people have found other ways to modify traditions to fit current restrictions. There is a story about a funeral home offering drive by visitation, complete with flowers and a box for cards. The final line of this article mentions that there will be a celebration of life planned when we are able to gather again.

Family and friends are finding ways to honor couples choosing to keep their wedding dates, too. This example of healthcare workers taking time to celebrate with a colleague and make their day a bit more special is especially touching knowing the stress and workload the workers are experiencing.

I encourage anyone facing the challenges of a wedding, welcoming or memorial service to exercise your own creativity in the time of COVID-19 and make plans to recognize your milestones as best you can during these difficult times. Remember that there will be opportunities for receptions, memorial services and gatherings of all kinds in the future. They will be even more significant when we can gather with friends and loved ones to recognize the milestone moments in our lives.

Weddings in the Time of COVID-19

 in Ceremony / Weddings  tagged COVID-19 / wedding / wedding ceremony / wedding planning / weddings by

Weddings in the time of COVID-19 are a new concept for all of us. The world has changed drastically in the last few weeks, and no one knows exactly when it will return to “normal”. Couples planning for 2020 weddings are struggling to decide what to do. And there aren’t easy answers.

Couples who have their marriage license in hand might consider having a simple certificate signing with only witnesses and the celebrant present, to be followed by the celebration of the marriage at a later date. I performed a simple certificate signing just yesterday for a couple who had been planning a ceremony next month in another state. We practiced social distancing, passed on handshakes upon meeting, and each used our own pens to sign the license. When it is safe again to gather, they will travel to the location close to family and friends to celebrate the marriage.

For couples with ceremonies booked with me, I am happy to reschedule with you to another available date within a year of your original date. Just contact me and we’ll make the changes. If your ceremony is planned for later in the year, we’ll continue to work on your ceremony until you tell me that it is going to be moved to a later date.

Weddings in the time of COVID-19 became even more difficult for local couples today with the temporary closing of the office that grants marriage licenses. Even a small certificate signing ceremony requires the official paperwork to make the marriage legal.

If you are in the early stages of wedding planning and are looking for a celebrant to work with, we can still move forward. Initial consultation meetings can be held via Skype and communications handled via email or phone. Please reach out to me and I’ll be happy to schedule time with you to discuss your ceremony wishes.

As we all figure out how to deal with weddings in the time of COVID-19, remember that weddings are about love. Lean on the love you have to help ground you in these challenging times, and together we’ll look forward to the days when we’ll be able to gather with loved ones to celebrate your love, your commitment and the beginning of your married life. In the meantime – stay calm and stay well.

Wedding Roles for Children

 in Ceremony / Weddings  tagged children in weddings / wedding / wedding ceremony / weddings by

Wedding roles for children are varied, but it’s important to select the role that fits the child or children. Traditional role for children are as flower girl and ring bearer, but you’re really only limited by your creativity and the children themselves.

For those selecting the traditional roles, consider your child’s age and temperament. Children younger than four often balk at the last minute. You’ll want to have a parent or caregiver with the child at the back of the aisle in case they need to be whisked away. Another friendly face at the front of the ceremony space can help a shy or overwhelmed child make it down the aisle to the safety of those loving arms. The key word if you’re going to have very young children in your processional is flexibility. Not theirs, but yours. As long as you understand that everything may not live up to your vision of perfectly spread flower petals on the aisle, little ones can be adorable and may even steal the show.

Beyond the traditional roles, older children can offer a simple reading, or hand out ceremony programs, or participate in a family unity ritual. It’s fine for you to make promises/vows to your children in a blended family situation, but I suggest you don’t ask the children to speak unless they really want to. It’s important to be respectful of conflicted feelings the children may have as this new family unit is formed.

Adult children may walk you down the aisle, stand with you as best man or maid of honor, offer a reading or participate in a family unity ritual. Even as adults, they may have complicated feelings about your marriage, so make sure you speak with them ahead of time and let them set the level of involvement that is right for them.

Wedding roles for children should always take their personalities and preferences into account. You want your ceremony to be a happy time where everyone is comfortable and able to celebrate with you.