Yearly Archives: 2021


Create Meaningful Ceremony – Memorials

Create meaningful ceremony to celebrate the important moments in life. In previous weeks I’ve written about creating personal weddings and welcoming a new child to your family. Now it’s time to discuss how to honor a loved one with a poignant memorial service.

Holding a memorial service serves four purposes:

  1. To honor and celebrate the life of the person who has died.
  2. To make space for everyone to say a private good-bye.
  3. To offer and receive support as a community of people who knew the honoree.
  4. To set your feet on a path of grieving leading to healing.
Memorial urn for a Dutch woman – surrounded by tulips

Here are some elements to consider as you work to create meaningful ceremony for a memorial service.

  • Use music to open and close the ceremony. Select pieces that connect to the honoree. Perhaps they were a country music fan, or loved patriotic marches. Classical music can always be used, too, and can be soothing.
  • Bring the honoree into the ceremony through mementos and their life story. Including a favorite team’s jersey or a quilt they made is a great visual. And make sure to share their life story through a biographical sketch.
  • Make space for shared stories. You might opt for “open mic” where guests can spontaneously share some of their interactions. Alternately, you can invite two or three people to share a slightly longer eulogy where they share highlights of the honorees life. For example, a professional colleague may speak about their work life, and an adult grandchild may share stories of time with grandma or grandpa.
  • Since guests may be of varying religious inclinations, it’s respectful to offer a time for silent reflection or prayer. You can use music or perhaps a video picture montage to accompany this time.
  • Finally, you want to draw people together and give them hope for brighter days ahead when their sorrow is not as profound as it is right now.

When you create meaningful ceremony by weaving these elements together you’ll both celebrate and honor the person who has passed. You’ll also support the family and friends in a memorable and appreciated manner.

Next time I’ll be talking about how to create meaningful ceremony around other milestone moments in life. Make sure to check it out in two weeks.


Create Meaningful Ceremony – Welcoming Ceremonies

Create meaningful ceremony to celebrate the important moments in life. Share your love with a personal wedding as discussed in my last blog post. Welcome a new child to your family with a sweet naming or welcoming ceremony. Honor a loved one with a poignant memorial service. Mark a new phase of life with an inspirational celebration. This week’s focus is on how to create a sweet welcoming or naming ceremony to celebrate a new addition to the family.

Naming or welcoming ceremonies are appreciated by families who are not religious, but want to celebrate the amazing experience of adding to their family. If the child is truly a newborn when the ceremony is held, a Naming Ceremony makes sense. If the child is 6 months or older, a more general Welcoming Ceremony may be more appropriate.

Family puzzle for Child Welcoming ceremony.

In either case, here are a few guidelines to remember:

  • If an infant or small child is the honoree, keep it short and sweet as attention spans are short. You might even want to keep it very informal – gather in a circle and let the little one wander inside while the ceremony happens.
  • Plan the ceremony around the child’s schedule. You don’t want a cranky child in need of a nap when everyone is gathering.
  • Include a ritual or activity that results in some kind of keepsake that can be shared with the child as they grow up and you can tell them about the ceremony.
  • It’s fun and appropriate to recognize parents, grandparents and others you expect to have an ongoing and influential role in the child’s life.
  • Keep the attendance list to family or very close friends. A child welcoming ceremony is often held at home, so keeping the guest list small helps.

With a Welcoming Ceremony you create meaningful ceremony for the parents and family now, and for the child later on when it can be shared with them. It is cause to gather, to celebrate, and to share food as you welcome the newest addition to the family.

Next time I’ll tackle the important memorial service. How to create meaningful ceremony to honor, celebrate and grieve the loss of a loved one.


Create Meaningful Ceremony – Weddings

Create meaningful ceremony to celebrate the important moments in your life. Share your love with a personal wedding. Welcome a new child to your family with a sweet naming ceremony. Honor a loved one with a poignant memorial service. Mark a new phase of life with an inspirational celebration. This week’s focus is on how to create a personal, custom wedding ceremony.

Your wedding ceremony needs to reflect you as a couple. Here are five ways to ensure that the ceremony is authentic for you and honors the commitment you are making to each other in marriage.

  1. Before the first word of the ceremony is spoken, set the tone with music. Use your favorite genre or select lyrics that speak to you.
  2. Bring your guests into your ceremony by acknowledging the role they’ve had in your lives to date, and asking for their support for your marriage going forward.
  3. Tell your story. Or more accurately, have your officiant retell vignettes that share how your love story evolved.
  4. Write your own vows. The centerpiece of the ceremony, this is your opportunity to make promises to your love that are meant to last a lifetime.
  5. Choose your wedding party intentionally. Select those people who support you and your relationship. Pay less attention to traditional gender roles and matching numbers, and surround yourselves with love.
Personal Wedding Ceremony with modern wedding party

When you create meaningful ceremony to begin your wedding day celebration you express your love in memorable ways. You also engage your guests to celebrate with you and prepare everyone to move on to the next parts of your important day.

Next time I’ll be talking about how to create meaningful ceremony when you’re welcoming new members to the family. Make sure to check it out in two weeks.


The Importance of Celebrating Love

The importance of celebrating love cannot be overstated. Even as the pandemic continues to rage in our country, celebrating love with the upcoming Valentine’s Day holiday, with engagements and with weddings this year is crucial to our experience as humans.

If we accept the importance of celebrating love as a major milestone in our lives, we then need to decide how to do that. Couples may celebrate anniversaries of first dates or the first exchange of “I love you’s”. Later in their relationships, proposals made be planned and executed. The period of time between proposal and wedding known as the engagement is another celebration of love.

During the engagement period most couple’s reflect seriously on what a lifetime commitment means to them. They may move in together and make the adjustments necessary to lovingly share space. And of course, they usually plan their wedding.

Wedding plans are going to be challenging again this year due to COVID, and some couples may choose to plan a 2022 wedding hoping to avoid restrictions and worries. No matter how large or small the celebration, no matter how short or long the planning cycle is, the wedding day will arrive. On that day, the couple will stand in front of a few or many of their loved ones and publicly voice their commitment to each other. They will demonstrate the importance of celebrating love in a way uniquely their own because they are unique, their relationship is unique, and the future in front of them is unique.

So with the Valentine’s Day holiday upon us, let’s remember the importance of celebrating love … even when a pandemic is making life extra challenging. Love will prevail, couples will get engaged and marry, and life will go on! So this weekend, lift a toast To life and love!


Four Wedding Trends for 2021

Four wedding trends for 2021 are influencing couples planning their marriages this year. The pandemic continues to drive changes to what is possible and what is safe. We can’t know when we will return to some sort of “normal” where weddings are concerned, but couples will certainly be influenced by these four wedding trends this year.

  1. Shorter planning cycles. States are frequently changing the number of people who can gather based on current COVID numbers and spikes. Couples are choosing to schedule, plan, invite guests, and hold their weddings within a few weeks to months. This in turn drives the next trend.
  2. Smaller guest lists. Smaller weddings can be planned more quickly and held more safely, both considerations in 2021. Some couples are choosing to have only very close family and friends. Others are focusing on local friends and family so guests don’t have to incur the risks involved in airports, airplanes and hotels. There is an upside to more intimate weddings as couples are able to include guests in meaningful ways in the ceremony and throughout the day.
  3. More intentionality in the wedding day. Couples who have delayed or postponed weddings from last year will tend to be more thoughtful about what is truly important to about the day. They might have fewer people in attendance, but will want something special and memorable. Choices around the ceremony, dinner and reception may all be customized for your day.
  4. Weekdays. 2021 will likely host many weddings postponed from last year, along with the events for newly engaged couples. This will put a strain on venues and other wedding vendors. Venue availability in particular will drive couples to get creative and consider weekdays for their weddings.

These four wedding trends for 2021 relate to each other and are all driven by the pandemic we’re living through. If you’re planning, or re-planning a wedding for this year you’ll likely feel the impact of some or most of these. But there are upsides to each of these trends, too. Ultimately the weddings of 2021 will be special and unique because each couple is.